Finding My Pace

I thought going in to the last marathon that I could run between 10:30-11:00 min miles. But that was simply not the case. When I think about the last training cycle all I think about is pain and inconsistency.  I battled foot pain, blisters, and a pretty tough achillies pain (tendonitis?). Coming off the marathon the only thing that seemed to help get over all the stupid aches and pains was to just take a break. So I didn't run for about 6 weeks and now I feel like I'm starting over.

I decided to actually pay for a training plan so that I didn't just run whatever I thought would work during the week and then do a long run on the weekend. There were a lot of different requirements in my search, as I have a very inconsistent work schedule, get bored easily and am really wanting help build a strong base.

I didn't want to spend a lot of money on a plan built just for me and a lot of the plans were very structured and repetitive.  Run the Edge offered the perfect plan (Level Up Ultimate 26.2) for me as it's all time based, I can move through it at my own pace, and it's interactive and ever changing. Hopefully it will work out! 

This brings me to my original point. A lot of the weekly miles are based on effort. Today I decided to do my "long run" (I'm going to my sister's graduation this weekend and wanted to save the shortest workouts for Saturday and Sunday) and it was supposed to be done at "medium" effort. Finding a medium effort is super hard for me. Running at an easy pace (around 12:00 min/mile) is a piece of cake, and finding a hard pace (around 8:45-9:30) is not challenging, but getting somewhere in the middle and holding it is something I haven't quite mastered yet. Luckily I have another 4 or 5 weeks of "easy" or short distance running to figure it out. I still have to find what my goal marathon pace is too. I'm still at the point where just running a race that I feel I did as well as I could is my goal, not so much for time. 

As always the biggest challenge will be forcing myself to stick to a plan the whole way through. Especially once my schedule starts to interfere.

Pity

Today (ahem yesterday, as it is now 12:30AM Saturday) a coworker of mine said, "so what have you been doing besides work lately?"

"Nothing new." (It felt like an odd question to me. There was clearly a follow up coming."

"Katie, I feel bad for you. You need to make something out of your life."

--insert jaw dropping-to-the-floor-face here--

...

Pity. I get it from this particular person a lot. Why does it bother me so much? Is it because I'm not used to being pitied? I certainly haven't felt like I deserved anyone's pity in the last few years (let's call AFK for after fat Katie). Or is it because I see some truth to it? 

Is being single (and not really mingling) in your mid to late twenties pitiable? Or is it just that in the eyes of twenty something it is? Because I don't go out to eat; because I don't go to bars; because I don't spend lots of money (I don't have) on fancy cars and clothes; does that mean they pity me?

This is crazy! How have I even been brought to the point where I think I should be pitied?

Let's recap what I've done, the good and the bad, AFK.

I moved back home. I moved to Atlanta. I got a full time, regular income kind of job. I ran a marathon. Then I did it again. I ran 4 half marathons, 3 10ks, a 4 miler, and 4 5ks in 2 years. I've run hundreds of miles. I've run over a thousand miles! I learned what a chaturanga push up is. I got to the point where I could actually do one. I forgot how. I traveled to Baltimore, Washington, D.C., Townsend, Vegas, Dayton and of course, Savannah. I went to the Grand Canyon for the first time. I found out in good at property management. I got a road bike. I've only road 50 or so miles on said 7 month old bike. I walk to work. I was asked to be a bridesmaid. I found a mentor, who became a friend and who is now more like an annoying older brother. I joined a choir. And then joined another. I was a member of a cast in a production of Oliver!. I learned I can run for over three and a half hours, but I usually feel like crying half way through. Running brought me back 2 friends I'd never thought I'd call friends again.  I found a roommate. I went to a funeral. Ian Somerholder offered me his tea, then got mad when I didn't drink it. I learned that letting go is so much easier than holding a grudge. Then I found another. I'm more independent then ever. I'm alone a lot. 

Being alone is not pitiable.

I'm fine being alone.

Alone.